Why Wayne Rooney keeps breaking his foot
Award-winning Shrek lookalike Wayne Rooney is having little luck with his prized footballing feet. The fat ex-blueshite and now Man Ure player has once again broken a bone in his foot -:)
Firstly, like anyone outside of Cornwall cares; secondly it is not to difficult to work out why Wayne Rooney keeps breaking his foot.
Wayne, what you need to do is send some of your mates around to David Moyes house and look for the Voodoo that your ex-boss and Gollum lookalike is using to curse you! Or is that Colleen likes you wearing her high heels and as a result it has weakened your feet?
Wayne, I think it’s great you have smashed your foot up again, because now I can watch Match of the Day without watching your foul mouth abusing anyone who dares to get in your way.
I don’t buy into the England team hype either. Honestly, I would rather have a joint masturbation session with Anne Widdecombe then watch the crap England team managed by the most dour personality in football.
Professor Steven Hawkin excites me more than Steve ’should have been killed at birth, because he’s ginger’ McLaren.
Wayne, hurry and get well soon otherwise you’ll annoy Colleen so much she will not have the time to write her scintillating fashion columns.
